Title: Infatuation
By: Claire P.
e-mail:tvfreak85@hotmail.com
Category: Smallvile, Lex/Lana
Genre: Romance
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Lana wonders if Lex is thinking of her.
Setting: New Year’s Eve at the Luthor Mansion, doesn’t really matter what
year, I just needed a social gathering. Use your imagination.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the crayon I used to write this.
~ ** ~
If I could have just a moment of you
Would I be wanting more?
If I could have just a taste of you
Would I be addicted?
If I could have just a touch of you
Could I tear myself away?
~ ** ~
Lex stood far from Lana, talking to some nameless person. It was probably
better for her; she had the chance for a full body view of him. She had
finally gotten to the point where she had given up trying to stop herself
from staring, and yes, even fantasizing about Lex Luthor. Now, she lived
for the moments when she had the opportunity to get a glance of him, which
were few and far between.

"Do you know that you always look like you have something on your mind?"

The voice broke into Lana’s private thoughts, pulling her from her
daydream.

"Do I?" she asked. She wasn’t aware it was that obvious, and suddenly
wondered if it was noticeable the millions of other times that she thought
about Lex.

"Need someone to talk to?"

"No, but thanks, Clark." Lana felt guilty, because she really did want to
talk to someone. It wasn’t that she couldn’t trust Clark or didn’t feel
comfortable talking to him, she just knew that it wasn’t something he’d
want to hear. It was obvious how Clark felt about her, she even considered
being with him. She realized, though, that that would be taking the easy
way out. Being with Clark would be the simple escape, it would be so easy
to just give in and love him.
There would just be one little problem: she didn’t care about Clark the way
he wanted her too. Instead, she had developed an unhealthy desire towards a
good friend of his.

Lana wasn’t sure when this obsession with Lex began. He just subtly weaved
himself into her life. Originally, the only times they spoke, their
conversations were focused around Clark. But soon, they were able to meet
with each other without having to use the pre-tense of her and Clark. And
before she knew it, she found herself longing for Lex, and Clark was
history.
Lana knew that no good could come of her feelings for Lex, but that
wouldn’t stop her. She wanted him. There was a mystery and an intrigue
about him that was simply overwhelming.
She sat there, watching him, studying his every move, memorizing each
expression in fine detail. He had a certain charisma to him; he was one of
those people that you knew were bright, just by watching them speak. He had
her in a trance. She didn’t care if her feelings went unnoticed, or were
unrequited. For now she was content with admiring him from afar.

Lex turned, and his eyes met hers for a fleeting moment. Fleeting because
Lana’s eyes darted away and all over the room the second they met his. She
could feel her heart racing, and she began to tremble, not that those
feelings were unfamiliar to her when she was around him. She wondered if
she was being ridiculous, and perhaps Lex hadn’t noticed Lana staring at
him. Or maybe he would choose to ignore it.

But what if he didn’t? What if he decided to confront her and put her on
the spot?
Or worse, what if he laughed at her? How would she defend herself?

She could feel someone approaching behind her. She knew it was Lex. She
flipped through a million excuses in her mind to explain why she was
starring at him. Maybe she did care a little if he knew about how she felt.

As she prepared to rationalize her actions, Lana watched the person
approaching her walk right passed her… it wasn’t Lex. She had been
over-reacting. As she relaxed, she was filled with a feeling of relief.

"Boo." Lex’s voice came from behind her, making her nearly jump out of her
skin.

When Lana finally managed to get her voice back, she greeted Lex, "Hey…"

"You look like you’re having a blast" he commented with a hint of sarcasm.

"It’s not so bad," Lana’s voice was quiet. She was so used to putting
distance between them that now, with Lex’s proximity, Lana felt anxious and
uneasy. Could he tell how nervous she was around him?

"You know, if you’re bored, you don’t have to stick around here. You can go
outside and get some fresh air, maybe take a walk. Or you can wander around
this place, I wouldn’t mind."

"I think I would get lost if I started wandering around…"

"So what?"

Lana knew Lex was waiting for a response, but she didn’t have any to give.
She couldn’t exactly say ‘no thanks, I’d rather stay here and be near you’.
So she just shrugged.

"Look, I just don’t want you to be miserable. It’s New Year’s eve, enjoy
yourself!"

"I’m not miserable," Lana told him.

"Sure you’re not." Lex said back, obviously not believing her. He didn’t
provoke her, though; instead he just walked away.

After giving it some thought, Lana decided she could use some time away
from him, and everyone, to get her emotions back under control. Trying to
remain as indiscrete as possible, she slipped out of the room.

The Luthor mansion was much too large to see the majority of it, so she
thought she would stick to the closest room behind a closed door. She
opened it, walked in and flipped the lights on. A washroom. Not much to see
there, she thought, so she moved on to the second closest room. It was a
bedroom, too small to be for anyone that lived there, not to mention it was
on the first floor. Her best guess was that is was for the drunks at any of
their parties that couldn’t make it home in their condition. The room was
plain, only a bed, a small night table and a mirror were contained within
it. No wallpaper, no pictures or personal touches. Not that she expected
the Luthors would keep any photographs or anything in their own room, let
alone a guestroom.
Lana was suddenly shocked by the sound of the door closing. It reminded her
that she probably should have shut it when she came into the room. She
turned around. No doubt, it was Lex standing before her. Once again, she
felt herself trembling and her heart pounding.

"Lost yet?"

Lana shook her head. "No" she said, in the tinniest voice.

Lex walked closer to her. "I don’t even know what this room is doing here.
It was just empty space we had nothing to do with, really."

Lana nodded, much to the extent of her capabilities at the moment. Lex
continued to walk towards her until there was barely a shred of light
between them. Slowly, and a bit hesitantly, he moved his mouth towards her
ear, brushing her cheek with his along the way and sending her mind
spiraling from the contact.

"You know… there’s a room upstairs that’s virtually sound-proof," he
whispered, "people could do anything in there-even yell-and no one would
know." The meaning beneath his words took a moment to sink in for Lana.

Lana wasn’t sure what to do with herself, she felt excited and anxious and
eager. Her stomach was in knots, her mind was reeling, and her senses were
overwhelmed from his words, his closeness, and his breath that lightly
tickled her neck. He was close enough to kiss with great ease. And she was
desperately tempted to.

Lex backed away just enough to look at her. His eyes were dark, and his
gaze would not leave hers. She wasn’t sure how long he was facing her, but
with every second that passed, the need to kiss him grew. She didn’t want
much from him, no ‘happily ever after’ or ‘til death do us part’. She just
wanted to be desired by him, she wanted to touch him, she wanted to satisfy
this craving for him.

In an instant, she decided take matters into her own hands. She threw her
arms around him and pulled him into a kiss that she had been waiting and
longing for from him for the longest time.

~ ** ~
I would pray to be the rain that runs over and in your skin
With no consequence
To be the liquid in your glass that falls around your lips and mouth
Swallow me
~ ** ~

Lex casually nodded, again. He wasn’t paying attention to the words; they
flowed in but never registered. Occasionally, he would put his own input
into the conversation, or give a polite but distinguished laugh when cued.
He could put on the show naturally when he needed too. Normally it was
because he really didn’t give a damn about what the other person was
saying.
This time, however, it was mainly because he was preoccupied. It happened a
lot when she was within fifty feet of him. There was this blind spot to
everything else but her, and he couldn’t stay attentive to anything he was
doing. At the moment, he was watching her out of the corner of his eye. He
desperately wanted to look at her, even for just a quick glance. He waited
for a break in the conversation he was having so he could look away.

Another cue to laugh. Finally, he was able to turn his gaze to her for the
briefest of moments. He met her eyes momentarily before she quickly looked
away and started fidgeting. Lex nearly did a double-take. Was Lana staring
at him? Lex couldn’t help the smirk on his face.
"Lex, we really should finish this conversation some time," the man facing
Lex began to speak again. "Right now, though, I hear another glass of
Merlot calling me." The man walked off in Lana’s direction.

Lex wondered if he should go over there and talk to her. He just didn’t
know what to say, and ‘hey, I noticed you were staring in my direction’
didn’t seem to appropriate. Plus, he was worried what response he would
get.

After debating it, he decided to just try some small talk, it never failed.
Lex slowly approached her until he was standing right behind her. He leaned
down and whispered a quick "boo" in her ear, successfully startling her.

"Hey" she said, softly.

Lex made a sarcastic remark about how much she looked like she was enjoying
herself. He noticed she hadn’t moved much from that seat all night. Lana
told him she was fine, but Lex could tell she felt out of place. He
suggested a walk, which she refused, worried that she might get lost. That
brought a smile to Lex’s face as he thought of the possibilities of getting
Lana lost in his home. He even let a "so what?" slip out before he could
stop himself.

"I just don’t want to see you miserable," he told her honestly, trying to
get a smile or something out of her.

"I’m not miserable" she replied. That was a lie, he knew it.

"Sure you’re not…"

Lex could see that he wasn’t getting anywhere with Lana. He hoped that if
he left her alone perhaps she would consider his advice. Sure enough, a
short while after he walked away, Lex saw Lana leave the room.

Wanting to keep an eye on her, he left the party as well to follow her. As
he walked down the corridor, he noticed an open door among the other closed
ones, and figured she was probably in there.

He peaked in and saw her examining the walls. Quietly, Lex walked into the
room and gently shut the door behind him. Lana abruptly turned around to
face him. She looked a little out of breath.

"Lost yet?"

Lana took a second to answer. "No."

For lack of anything else to say, Lex decided to explain the room to her.
"I don’t even know what this room is doing here. It was just empty space we
had nothing to do with, really." He began to close the distance between
them.

Lex wondered how Lana would react if he kissed her. He was close enough to,
and he certainly wanted to. He almost did, but decided, instead, to lean
into her ear. He paused briefly to brush his cheek against hers and indulge
in the feel of her skin.

"You know…" he began to whisper, "there’s a room upstairs that’s virtually
sound-proof. People could do anything in there-even yell-and no one would
know." Lex regretted his words momentarily, hoping that they wouldn’t scare
her off.

He slightly adjusted his position so he could look her in the eyes. She was
looking at him in a way that he could not read. He wasn’t sure if it was
dismay or passion.

Lex worried how long he could control himself for. He noticed her eyes
trail down his face to his lips. She was thinking about kissing him, he
could tell. He wondered if he should initiate it, or if she would kiss him
first.

He got his answer when she threw herself around him so quickly and
unexpectedly that he nearly fell over. Lex didn’t waste any time. It didn’t
take long for him to deepen the kiss, and wrap his arms around her, trying
to pull her as close to him as possible. He could feel her hands roaming
over his back, his shoulders, as if trying to find something to hold on to.
Lex tightened his grasp on Lana, not wanting to let go. He knew that the
moment he did, he would have nothing left of her but the memory of feeling
her body pressed up to him, her wandering hands, and her lips against his.

From the other room, they could hear a voice shout, "Two minutes till
midnight!"

Lex could feel Lana pull away from him. It was a good thing, too, because
he was about two seconds from pinning her up against the wall, and loosing
any willpower he may have had left.
Lana’s eyes were lightly shut and she was still clutching to his shoulders
when she let out the faintest sigh that nearly drove Lex insane. His
breathing was heavy, and he let his forehead meet hers, extending the
moment for a while longer. He went to kiss her again, but knowing that he
would not be able to pull away if he did, he planted a small kiss on the
tip of her nose instead.
Taking a deep breath, he let go of Lana, and stepped away from her. Before
he could give himself a chance to change his mind, he walked away and back
into the party filled with the smiling faces of cheerful people. It
depressed Lex that he wasn’t still in Lana’s company. Already, he was
questioning just how real all that had happened with her had been.


~ ** ~
If I could have just a breath of you
Would you, could you infect me?
If I could have just a view of you
Would you leave your door ajar?
If I could have just a part of you
Let me drink of your tides
~ ** ~
--Taste, Lorna Vallings